Lessons from a Facebook Pregnancy

So, I posted often during my pregnancy on Facebook. I tried to keep track of them but *sigh* math makes my head hurt! :-) Enjoy the journey through my pregnancy via my status updates.

Was told twice that it was impossible and after 16 years almost believed it. NEVER doubt what is possible with God. Never underestimate his timing or that he has a perfect plan for you. WE ARE PREGNANT!!! March 16 at 6:19pm

Pregnancy Post #2: Today we get to try the strength of the raging hormones pulsing through my body against the idiocy of an all day PD day 2 hours away. Wagers anyone? March 17 at 6:14am

Pregnancy Post #3: My boobs are AWESOME. :-D March 29 at 9:14pm

Pregnancy Post #4: Everything seems to be getting bigger except my bladder. April 6 at 9:32am

Pregnancy Post: The cat is almost dead, traumatized the boy this morning during an intimate moment with the husband, used hairspray as deodorant and am eating egg rolls for breakfast. Even I don't know what to say... April 7 at 6:35am

Pregnancy Post: It's a girl! :-) April 11 at 1:44pm

Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #5: My appetite for everything has increased. *wink wink* Who would have thought that was even possible? :-D April 12 at 6:06pm

Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #6: Like a cranky old man or a ruthless teenaged boy, my flatulence knows no limits. April 17 at 8:07am

Pregnancy Post #7: Today I FEEL pregnant. And not in the nausea-laden, boob throbbing, I can't ever sleep enough kind of way. :-D Okay... I AM pretty tired, but all that other stuff. April 19 at 6:50pm

Pregnancy Post #8: Today I bought my first baby thing-a Wonder Woman onesie. :-D April 22 at 7:00pm

Pregnancy Post #9: This week 3 people have commented that I'm "showing". Sorry folks, I'm a big girl. I'm not showing. Probably not for a month or more. But thanks? I think. April 23 at 12:45pm

Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #10: I had THE strangest dream about my high school principal last night. I have no idea why I pulled up his image from that many years ago. Pass the brain bleach. I'm afraid to fall asleep tonight... April 26 at 7:44pm

Pregnancy Post #11: It doesn't really matter why I take off work anymore. Everyone just assumes it has something to do with the baby. Anyone want to join me for a long weekend? Compliments of the fetus. :-D April 27 at 12:15pm

Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #12: I have peed 8 times today. May 6 at 3:19pm

Pregnancy Post #13: I'm half way pregnant this week!!! ...err...well...half way there. You know what I mean. *giggle* May 10 at 7:02am

Pregnancy Post 14: ßis taking her boys to the ultrasound appointment today! :-D Hurray! :-D May 17 at 7:42pm

Pregnancy Post 15: Jason claims to have sympathy gas. May 19 at 6:00pm

Pregnancy Post #16: I tried on a pair of maternity shorts today. I refused to buy them because they were SOOOOOO comfortable that I'm sure I would never wear another kind of pants for the rest of my life. :-( May 19 at 6:01pm

Pregnancy Post #16: I will never get tired of this feeling. :-D May 22 at 6:42pm

Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #17: Uhm...these used to be a different color! YIKES! May 25 at 1:21pm

Pregnancy Post #18: Can one pump and drive? May 25 at 9:01pm

Pregnancy Post #19: I.did.not.cry. :-D Graduation came and went and I didn't cry. May 26 at 9:11pm

Pregnancy Post #20: I'm pretty sure she's going to be a martial artist of sorts. :-D I'm secretly hoping for "ninja". June 1 at 7:09pm

Pregnancy Post #21: Keep waking up in the middle of the night covered in sweat. blech. Dr. Internet says its "hormone surges". Dr. Tracy says "it sucks". June 5 at 8:28am

Pregnancy Post #22: Pregnasaurus. That's my charming name of endearment? I wonder how "Alimonius Rex" works for him. And shut up. I'm not crabby. June 6 at 10:04pm

Slightly Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #23: A kick so hard my belly shook. Not like a bowl full of jelly. Kind of like a garbage bag full of cellulite. June 6 at 10:08pm

Pregnancy Post #24: My mommy bought me maternity shorts. I told her that I was nervous about wearing them because they are so comfy I may never stop wearing then. Her reply? "Its okay. I wore the white pair last week. They ARE super comfy." *giggle* God help me. June 7 at 8:00pm

Pregnancy Post #25: Hurray! Ultrasound day! *keeping our fingers crossed that we get one of the cool 3-D rooms today* June 8 at 6:57am

Pregnancy Post #26: She is perfect! :-) June 8 at 2:58pm

Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #27: Earlier this week at the ultrasound they used a gallon of goop and the strength of 10 grinches plus 2 during the ultrasound. The result? An OLD scar from a surgery seems to be...uhm...leaking. I sure hope the baby doesn't regard this as some kind of sun roof. :-P June 10 at 7:29 pm

Inappropriate Pregnancy Post #28: Concerned that my nips may be the largest in the world, I did a little research today. Not even close. According to the ever reliable website *not going to type it because its soft core porn* the largest ones are 4 cm long (that's an inch and a half for you Americans that never learned metric). I'm am both intrigued and disturbed. And now you are too. June 11 5:52 pm

Pregnancy Post #29: Have I mentioned how deliriously happy this little uterus ninja makes me? I've just spent half an hour looking at baby girly accessories. :-D June 12 6:46pm

Pregnancy Post #30: I'm the crazy woman that refers to herself in the plural. :-D Note to Self: Do this less in public. June 13 at 11:00am

Pregnancy Post #31: This morning while snuggling in bed half-asleep, Jason's hand is on my belly.

Jason: Whoa! Was that you?
Me: Uhm, no. *giggling* That was her.
Jason: That was amazing!
Me: Yes. Amazing. :-) June 16 at 10:10am

Pregnancy Post #32: I can seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee her moving!:-D Now, it looks kinda like a rabid squirrel is awkwardly breakdancing in the depths of my belly fat, but it is AMAZING! :-D June 17 at 6:53pm

Pregnancy Post #33: Today I feel fat. And hungry. And I need bigger underwear. June 20 at 11:46am

Pregnancy Post #34: I am now referring to her as my Uterine Overlord. For example “My Uterine Overlord has declared it is snack time.” Or “My Uterine Overlord is tired of listening to your nonsense. You may now leave our presence or shield yourself from an eminent boot to the head.” June 22 at 8:25pm.

Pregnancy Post #35: You know what’s great about being awake at 4:00am? Yeah, me either. June 24 at 4:28 pm.

Pregnancy Post #36: Heading into the 3rd trimester with day 6 of feeling like crap in the morning. Sometime around mid-afternoon food is good and I’m not nauseous. Is this pregnancy blah or am I fighting off the plague? June 26 at 8:17am.

Pregnancy Post #37: Been reading up on labor and delivery because obviously I’m a complete masochist. 10 hours of labor? 22? 36? Holy crap. I don’t even want to do something that feels GOOD for that amount of time! June 27 at 10:35pm.

Pregnancy Post #38: I am a big fat whale with big fat fingers and big fat toes. I ate an entire pack of sweet rolls yesterday. Don’t roll your eyes. It was the family pack size. THE FAMILY PACK. It makes me sad because I really want some now and they are all gone. July 3 at 5:29pm.

Pregnancy Post #39: Baby Dr. Day tomorrow! Had a dream that I told him that I felt like a big fat whale and he nodded and said that I looked like one. LOL. Here’s hopin’ that doesn’t happen. My guess is that Jason would fall out of his chair laughing if it did! :-D July 5 9:04pm.

Pregnancy Post #40: My sweet baby is 3 pounds 3 ounces and gave us a big thumbs up during the ultrasound. :-) July 6 at 2:26 pm

Pregnancy Post #41: Today I got a breastfeeding book in the mail. It may be a bad sign for the baby and my breasts that I giggled out loud 4 or 5 times in the first 10 pages. July 9 at 9:01pm

Pregnancy Post #42: The spawn of Jason growing inside of me has me taking enough insulin to kill a horse. Well…probably not a diabetic horse. July 12 at 10:33pm

Pregnancy Post #43: Wow! Pregnant Tracy is quite the multi-tasker! Today I can sneeze and pee at the same time!!! :-D July 14 at 12:02pm.

Pregnancy Post #44: There are moments, just occasionally, when a blinding white-hot panic seizes me as I ponder the reality of my amazing life. July 16 at 7:38pm

Pregnancy Post #45: “and uh 1 and uh 2 and uh 3 uuuuuuuugh!” ßMe rolling over in bed. And getting off the couch. And deciding how many sandwiches I’ll eat. July 17 at 9:44pm

Pregnancy Post #46: I’ve ordered the crib set. :-D July 19 at 7:44pm.

Pregnancy Post #47: Doctors say funny things. Funny things like "Let's deliver the baby around 37 weeks." Silly guy. Doesn't he realize HOW SOON THAT IS? July 20 at 10:03pm

Pregnancy Post #48: Fact #1: I'm a walking talking incubator. Fact #2: Doctor says I'm being attacked by hormones at night. That's why I'm so hot that I can't sleep regardless of the frost on the windows. Fact #3: Heat index hit 108 today. Fact #4: I'm sleeping in the refrigerator tonight. July 21 at 10:13pm

Pregnancy Post #49: I've had lots of swelling in my hands and feet lately and wake up every morning with intense pain in my left wrist. I didn't connect the wrist pain to anything other than my crappy new bed. Dr. Internet says this is "normal" for pregnant women. Normal? July 24 at 3:04pm

Pregnancy Post #50: Sophia Elizabeth King

Now quit asking. :-D July 25 at 9:20am

Pregnancy Post #51: Flashlight+Fetus=FUN! :-D July 26 at 10:34pm

Pregnancy Post #52: I saw pictures of my pleasantly plump pregnant self this weekend, so when I got home I stepped on the scale. It said “to be continued”. :-D July 31 at 8:47pm

Pregnancy Post #53: She has hair! Lots and lots of hair! :-) I think this latest ultrasound means I need to go shopping for ribbons and bows and cute little headbands! Hurray!!! August 1 at 3:28pm

Pregnancy Post #54: This evening’s snacks: blackberries, cheese balls and pickled okra. :-) August 2 at 9:52pm

Pregnancy Post #55: I am ROCKIN' the cankles tonight. Watch out boys! ;-) August 3 at 11:02 pm.

Pregnancy Post #56: So, from now until delivery I go in twice a week for monitoring. Awesome. I get to sit in a comfy chair for half an hour while the baby kicks and plays (she's an overachiever already) and then get a short little ultrasound. :-D I get to see her AND hear her twice a week until I can hold her in my arms. :-) August 4 at 6:02pm

Pregnancy Post #57: The crib is up and made, pink bags fill the bedroom; blankets are in the wash…31 days. :-) August 8 at 12:13pm.

Pregnancy Post #58: The baby is moving and kicking and frolicking so much that I can hardly sit still! August 10 at 5:17pm

Pregnancy Post #59: There are little pink clothes in the dresser, diapers lined up on the changing table, blankets folded, and tiny little shoes lined up. J My feet are swollen and look like a can of exploded biscuits, my boobs are awesome and Sophie is rockin her bedtime dance by doing what feels like the boot scootin’ boogie on my cervix. The boys are resting, the cats are playing and summer is slipping away. Just thought the world might need an update. August 14 at 10:44 pm

Pregnancy Post #60: Its too bad it isn’t something to do with nudity or flatulence. I’m okay with both of those. Instead…instead…I must collect my urine for an entire day in this gallon container that looks a little like one of those plastic gas cans. Can one buy a purse or satchel or something to discreetly carry that puppy in? And then….the best part…refrigerate it. Hello first day of school?!? Even I can’t make this kind of stuff up! LOL. August 15 at 8:51

Pregnancy Post #61:

♪♫♪All my bags are packed, I’m ready to go.

I’m standin’ here outside the door

I hate to be awake and so I sigh *sigh*

But the dawn is breakin’ its early morn

My feet are fat, maternity pants are worn

Already I’m so tired I could diiiiiiiiie! ♪♫♪

♪♫♪ So kiss me and smile for me,

Tell me how darn cute she’ll be,

Hold me cause my balance will sometimes go…♪♫♪

Everybody………!

August 19 at 6:54am

Pregnancy Post #62: Today the nurse drawing my blood whistled when he saw my feet and legs. Not in a “I wish you would wrap them around me kind of way” but in a “holy crap I haven’t seen anything that disturbing since I dissected a cat in med school kind of way.” And how was YOUR Friday? :-) August 19 at 9:08pm.

Pregnancy Post #63:

♪♫♪Are you in there little fetus?

In two weeks will you come greet us?

I will buy you some Adidas...♪♫♪♪♫

August 23 at 3:25am

Pregnancy Post #64: Things that have made me cry this week: A Baby Story on TLC, “Thank You” by Ray Boltz, no chocolate pudding after sending someone specifically for chocolate pudding, kitty stepping on my poor swollen feet and a very fuzzy ultrasound showing my sweet little baby frolicking in utero. J August 26 at 7:47am.

Pregnancy Post #65: Twelve. 12. Doce. Douze. Zwölf. Dodici. TWELVE MORE DAYS!!! Oh…and look who learned to use Google translator in the middle of the night. J August 28 at 8:29am.

Pregnancy Post #67: Home! Finally! Everything seemed to take forever today with doctor appointment, ultrasound and monitoring. Good news is that baby is doing very well and all my gauges and fluids are stable *giggle*. She is one big girl though! We are still on for September 9th unless she decides to make her debut early. Is it bad that I’m kinda hopin’ she does? August 29 at 8:55pm

Pregnancy Post #68: We’ve stopped saying “the baby is kicking”. We are now referring to her movements as to what they can be measured at on the Richter scale. August 30 at 8:51pm

Pregnancy Post #69: It seems that I may miss having this little miracle inside me. :-( Is that weird? August 31 at 8:33pm

Pregnancy Post #70: There’s no parade, but my outfit for church this morning has me looking like a float for the labor day parade! LOL. WoOoOoOot! September 4 at 9:11am

Pregnancy Post #71: It’s LABOR Day. My fingers are crossed, my mind is ready, my uterus is full. Ya’ll know how I love a theme. Today would be a great day to have a baby! Now…if I can just convince HER of that! LOL September 5 at 6:45am

Pregnancy Post #72: I have realized this week that my hair is thicker and fuller. Its good to know its not just my feet and midsection that have reacted this way. :-) September 5 at 12:02pm

Pregnancy Post #73: My Least Favorite Things to Do: (1) Bending Over (2) Getting Up September 5 at 12:43pm

Pregnancy Post #74: Watching breastfeeding videos. It’s not as titillating as you might expect. Pun intended. ;-P September 5 at 7:33 pm

Pregnancy Post #75: Almost no sleep at all last night. Woke up sore and thirsty. No, not a night of partying. Well...unless you are an occupant of my uterus, then apparently it was one hard core, rockin' party. *sigh* September 6 at 10:08am.

Pregnancy Post #76: Going to what may be the last pre-delivery doctor’s appointment today. I’m taking my hospital bag and what I can scrape up of my optimism. I’m also taking along bribes to make sure this baby gets out today. I have also considered weapons. Not really. Well, maybe. September 6 at 11:04am

Pregnancy Post #77: The car seat and stroller have been put together. WooOoOT! :-) September 7th at 6:38pm

Pregnancy Post #78: This morning we test to see if Sophie is ready to make her debut tomorrow. I'm looking at it as an audition. Does that make me a stage mom already? September 8 at 7:15am

Pregnancy Post #79: Tests came back good. Baby tomorrow! HURRAY! :-) September 8 at 3:55pm

Pregnancy Post #80: Not sure I will be able to sleep the few hours that are set aside for that tonight. It’s like that excitement that you get before Christmas morning. Well...except I'll get a beautiful present AND narcotics. That might be even better. :-) September 8 at 7:44pm

Pregnancy Post #81: Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! Psalms 127:3-5 September 9 at 3:58am

Pregnancy Post #81: Me to Guy at Labor and Delivery Desk: Good morning! I'd like to have a baby now.

Guy: Wait. Do we do that here? September 9 at 5:59am

Pregnancy Post #83: I have no real idea what number post I'm on. September 9 at 6:09am

Pregnancy Post #84: Emptying uterus, filling quiver at St. John’s Mercy Medical Center September 9 at 6:29am

Final Pregnancy Post: We have been part of a miracle. To say that we are happy and blessed is an understatement. Sophie has arrived. She is a beautiful 8 pounds 14 ounces. Family of four. God is good!!! September 9 at 10:49am